Be True to Yourself

Your identity and your success go hand in hand. Many people sacrifice their identities by not doing what they really want to do. And that’s why they’re not successful. - Lisa Swell

Image is indeed everything; your image and not someone else’s idea of what you should be. In life, people would always pressurize you to live out their own ideals or dreams. That’s why it’s not uncommon to find mothers who wanted to be beauty queens put pressure on their daughters, to fulfill that dream or dads whose life ambition was to be lawyers or doctors pattern their kids’ lives to live out that goal, when they are unable to accomplish it themselves. We all have our individual purpose and destiny. We also have varied personalities that to a large extent, shape our thought patterns and the way we perceive things, hence the need for us to discover who we are and not what people want us to be.

Steps to discovering yourself:

The journey to discovering yourself starts with

1.      A paradigm shift/change: We need to sit back and re-evaluate what life lessons we’ve picked along the way and restore our minds to default setting. Then we can choose what things we need to move on or part with. It’s not an overnight re-programming system. It could take months or even years, but when you’re done, you’d be happier for it. I’d use a personal example here to buttress my point.

Growing up, people’s approval meant a lot to me. Often, I’d do things I wasn’t too comfortable with because I wanted to see the smile or nod of approval from people, especially loved ones. But I guess you all know where that leads one to; FRUSTRATION! Yeah, I was so frustrated; I became short-tempered, unhappy and moody. I was wilting inside, but smiling and all bubbly outside. I had a fantastic façade.  I knew though that I was living a lie. I knew there was more to me than what I was showing the world. When you try to blend in, you hurt yourself-purpose and destiny.  So guess what I did?

I took a mental break, analyzed my life and the reason behind the decisions I’ve made so far and saw just too clearly where I had missed it. I had been so engrossed in what other people think about me, and forgotten what I think about ‘ME’.

Unfortunately, a lot of us fall into this vortex. One minute you’re being wonderfully selfless and giving, the next minute, you’re stuck in a self-rut where you’ve forgotten your needs and what makes ‘You’ happy. We owe it to ourselves to make decisions that give us that inner peace and joy. A friend would always tell me ‘You owe no one explanations’, a mite arrogant, but true. If you keep looking over your shoulder to see how your actions are received by people, you’ll never finish the task at hand.

Would change be easy? No! People won’t be happy to see that they’re unable to manipulate and control you anymore. What people don’t understand, they hate; so expect friction. But in the end, you’d be a happier person for living true to yourself, and those who care enough would learn to accept you, the way you are. Don’t sit and wait for them to accept you though; keep moving on to the best of your life, let them catch up with you.

“Let go of anything that is holding you back, or slowing you down, and keeping you all bound up inside. If you are holding on to your past, it’s because there is something about your past that you think you still need.”- Bishop T.D Jakes

Remember, you can never please all the people all the time, so why bother trying? Do the best you can, please God and yourself, every other thing would fall in place.  

 

2.      SWOT Analysis:

To be cont. next week.